Hmmm… do I need a title?
I have been trying to avoid (with a dismal lack of success) commenting on the ongoing Israel-Palestine conflict.
But folks have reached out for my take on the protests happening on college campuses in the United States, and I figured, fuck it.
Here’s my perspective: for whatever it may be worth.
First, an apology because this is really fucking long (even by my prolix standards) and yes, I suck, and yes, I need an editor.
There’s a famous Voyager 1 photo looking back at the Earth (from 4 billion miles away) that Carl Sagan wrote about in his book, Pale Blue Dot.It’s worth reading the whole thing but the part that always hits home is:
“Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner, how frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds.”
We are, all of us, coordinated bursts of electric activity in a meat suit.
We are born and live and die in the blink of a cosmic eye.
In the words of a far better writer than I, we are born “astride of a grave, the light gleams an instant, then it’s night once more.”
That meager flicker of consciousness between birth and death is all the time we each have to make some kind of difference.
What’s the fucking point?
What’s the mission?
Everyone’s got a different answer, but for me I think that the only way to give meaning to life is to leave this world (even-infinitesimally) better than I found it.
I am a proud Palestinian-American.
I care deeply about Palestinian rights to freedom, security, and self-determination.
But I am also profoundly aware that true long-term freedom, security, and self-determination for Palestinians cannot exist without creating a reciprocal reality for Israelis.
There is no path to freedom that begins with oppression of the other.
That is not freedom.
That is a Pyrrhic victory that will turn to ashes in your mouth.
We are, both peoples, stuck on the world’s worst fucking amusement park ride, an eternally shitty and utterly predictable carousel of suffering.
There are only three ways off the carousel:
- We k*** all the Israelis.
Or
2. We k*** all the Palestinians.
Or
3. We somehow figure out how to live together.
That’s it.
There is no Option 4.
I might humbly suggest that for anyone with a picogram of human decency, there is actually only Option 3.
There are few (if any) groups in history who have been shit upon by the dominant culture, writ large, as consistently and enduringly as the Jewish people.
General tolerance/indifference in the Islamic world is about as good as it got, and IF YOU TAKE A LOOK AT EUROPE, you’re going to start seeing some deeply fucked up and cruel shit.
And all of that is before, and quite apart from, the incredibly inhuman frenzy of killing that was the Holocaust.
Given this very real perspective, it’s hard to dismiss the Jewish community’s vigilance and sensitivity toward anything that even remotely resembles antisemitism as an OVERREACTION.
The Jewish people have (hard-won) primary data on what happens with under-reaction and (putting my empathy hat on) I’m not sure that I’d react any differently.
The Jewish people have valid reasons to want their own nation.
I also want to center the Palestinian people and their traumas.
And to be clear, this isn’t meant to be an “I’ll see your Holocaust and raise you a Nakba” game…
I am not trying to diminish anything or anyone.
I am trying to contextualize.
As Palestinians, we paid for a historic antisemitism in which we largely did not participate (until the British showed up.)
We were forced off land we never left, to make way for people who made lives in exile but returned.
We were dispossessed of our birthright.
We are told that our connection to the land is invented.We are pawns in regional games and geo-political proxy wars.
We live in Bantustans as our occupiers are deferred to by Western nations in their collective guilt.
You cannot fault us for resistance to occupation.
You cannot fault us for refusing platitudes about the “regrettable loss of life” or “potentially indiscriminate bombing of civilian populations” or “disproportionate responses” … tut tut!
Few of the folks counting off days since 10/7 for the hostages have mourned for the thousands of Palestinians held by the Israeli government in administrative detention (look it up).
The Palestinian people have valid reasons to want their own nation.
My point isn’t equivalence. Trauma is not a contest.
And there is deep trauma and legitimate grievance on both sides.
If you cannot grieve for both peoples, then you do not understand.
If your ‘moral’ concern for innocent lives is measured in a formula that takes the national origin of the innocent dead as a meaningful part of your calculus, then fuck you.
You cannot hate and oppress a people and not expect them to fight back and this is as true for Jews as it is for Palestinians.
Those of us who actually want to solve this fucking thing need to acknowledge, recognize, and ACCEPT the grievances and fears experienced on all sides.
Ignoring this foundational context is useless.
It’s there.
It’s a very real reality that is valid and which profoundly affects individuals, their communities, and their choice of governments.
It is the water through which we must swim.
A few personal statements that I think are necessary to contextualize my perspective:
Hamas is fucking awful.
Whatever you may feel about legitimate resistance to occupation, there is no legitimate attacking of civilians.
Period.
10/7 was a war crime and most of Hamas’ operations are also war crimes.
Hamas deserves destruction and their impact on the Palestinian struggle for self-determination was corrosive and its effects will echo for years.
Let us be clear though on the fact that Hamas has been supported as a foil to the PA by multiple Israeli governments.
Israel’s actions in Gaza are disproportionate.
While Israel has the right (and responsibility) to go after Hamas, it is my belief that there were other ways to do this.
Israel is a world-class military power that has shown (time and again) that it has both the intelligence and the technology to do targeted strikes.
It is abundantly clear, both in word and deed, that the Gaza operation is retributive and punitive, and that war crimes are being committed.
The US government has been an impotent actor in this mess.
We have been played by Bibi at every turn and have, time and time again, protected Israel’s interests, well beyond any reasonable measure.
Honestly, it’s embarrassing to me as an American to see us engaging like we have no influence.
‘But Israel’s a sovereign country,’ you might say.
Please, let’s not be performatively obtuse.
We tell people what we expect them to do all the time.
That is how the Pax Americana works.
Israel is a freer country than many Arab states, but it is not a liberal Western democracy.
It’s Orwell’s “All animals are equal but some more equal than others.”
Israeli culture has a lot of nasty fucked up racist shit in it and while their right-wing government may well be an aberration of their goofy electoral system, it’s not unrepresentative of the public mood which is colored by decades of fighting and grievance with the Palestinians.
The Palestinian Authority is a fucked up, foundationally corrupt, and deeply broken Bantustan that has little if any resonance with the people it ostensibly represents.
It’s a kakistocracy of the highest order and Palestinian culture also has a lot of nasty fucked up antisemitic shit in it.Much like Israeli culture, there is little mandate for peace, an attitude colored by decades of fighting and grievance with the Israelis.
The Jewish-American identification with the Israeli government (while utterly understandable and logical given the very real history of Jewish persecution globally) has created weird contortions for people who are deeply liberal and ethical and progressive as they support a regime which, were it anything but Jewish, they would have a hard time supporting.
When you are at a rally to support a position and John Hagee is a featured speaker, trust me… you’re doing something wrong.
The Palestinian-American identification with resistance movements trying to ‘free’ Palestine (while utterly understandable and logical given the very real history of with Israel over the decades) has created weird contortions for some folks who advocate for peace and human rights for Palestinians as they support organizations that are deeply corrupt, hateful, and extremely problematic.
If literal antisemites and Nazis are drawn to your cause, trust me… you’re doing something wrong.
EVERYONE KNOWS WHAT THE SOLUTION IS.
Two states.
Viable.
Secure.
Independent.
Self-determining.
Sovereign.
Sinwar may not like it.
Ben Gvir may not like it.
Haniyeh may not like it.
Bibi may not like it.
But the reality is that we’ve known the solution for at least 60 years, and the fact that these fuckers oppose it only strengthens its validity from my perspective.
The only way we ALL emerge from this conflict alive and with dignity is through muddling through to coexistence.
Advocating for anything less is both short-sighted and dangerous in the long term.
There is no solution that just redistributes the suffering.
The goal should be the equitable reduction of suffering and conflict.
Two states, living side by side, is a compromise of maximalist ideals on both sides, but it’s a compromise that bows to reality and safeguards our future.
All of that said… so what?
What does any of it solve?
Where do we go from here?
How do we resolve the issue between these two deeply traumatized and deeply fucked up peoples?
Negotiation.
They need to talk this shit out but there is a sad little secret at the heart of this all.
It’s depressing.
It’s frustrating.
But it’s real.
NEITHER SIDE WANTS TO NEGOTIATE.
Not really.
I know it sounds super-unintuitive but it’s true.
Graham Greene, in his book, Our Man in Havana, has a character, Dr Hasselbacher, talk about lotteries;
“As long as nothing happens anything is possible, you agree? It is a pity that a lottery is ever drawn. I lose a hundred and forty thousand dollars a week, and I am a poor man.”
Neither side wants to negotiate because that’s something that will mean they have to (a) acknowledge the other’s right to exist, and (b) lose the possibility of achieving their maximalist goals.
Much easier instead, to argue and bicker and deny the validity of the other and maintain some kind of low simmer of conflict.
This has been Bibi’s goal for decades… he has openly run on killing Oslo, on preventing the formation of a Palestinian state.
Ironically, this is Hamas’ goal also.
They do not WANT peace either.
To my mind, the ONE tiny, barely visible on an electron microscope, miniature fucking scintilla of good that came out of 10/7 is the sense of acknowledgement that this is not sustainable… that this cannot keep going on and on from generation to generation.
We have, both Palestinians and Israelis, been betrayed by our leaders.
And we have responsibility for allowing extremists to set the agenda and define the conflict.
We need to vocally denounce leaders who perpetuate violence, hatred, and oppression.
Condemning Hamas (and any other ‘resistance’ organization) for acts of terrorism, and also the aggression and disproportionate responses of the Israeli government, isn’t just a moral imperative — it’s part of the solution.
True courage isn’t just speaking against your ‘enemy’; it’s speaking out against your own side.
That’s what integrity looks like.
It’s how we’ll get to the kind of dialogue that starves extremism of oxygen.
We need pro-Palestinians to protest against terrorism and antisemitism IN ADDITION to their pro-Palestinian advocacy.
We need Zionists to speak out against disproportionate acts of war and racism IN ADDITION to their pro-Israeli advocacy.
These are the kinds of actions that will pave the way for a conversation rooted in mutual respect and focused on a genuine desire to see peace.
These are the kinds of actions that will help dismantle the frameworks that have sustained conflicts, opening doors to solutions that were previously barricaded by mistrust and fear.
Because it is long past time to talk.
But how do you get motherfuckers who have built their careers on not talking to each other to talk to each other?
I’m going to guess that waiting for the idiots who perpetuate this shitshow to figure out how to fix it, is not the right move.
I’m going to guess that the world’s hegemon, should take its thumb out of its ass and stop equivocating and perpetuating this insanity.
It’s on us.
The United States of America.
It’s time to fix this.
As citizens of a democracy, we have one lever: voting.
I’m unhappy with the administration’s approach but to be abundantly clear, BIDEN IS THE ONLY OPTION FOR ANYONE WHO CARES ABOUT ISRAELIS OR PALESTINIANS.
I will be voting for Biden and encouraging others to vote for him BUT I do think that those of us who do disagree with the admin have the right and responsibility to protest and advocate for a different approach to the region and to make our perspective clear.
So, finally… on to the college protests.
I know.
Took me long enough.
But I’m determined to push this platform to the limits in an effort to push against social media’s norms as being the place where understanding, nuance, and basic decency come to die.
So… I’m trying to contextualize my perspective.
And that takes words.
It is what it is.
Where was I?
Oh yes… the college protests…
I understand (and remember) the urge to protest things that you feel are wrong and I wholeheartedly support it.
I understand (and remember) how youth can often paint the world in high contrast black and white.
I understand (and remember) how heavily oppression of others with whom you feel kinship can feel.
I understand (and remember) how broken the world can seem and how exciting it can be to try to rush in and fix it.
But growing older and meeting the battering ram of reality builds perspective and add context.
Nuance creeps in and blurs the edges of your high-contrast image of the world.
And sometimes, despite our most fervent wishes, the realities are more complicated than we want them to be.
I strongly support the right of anyone on any side of this conflict to protest and advocate for their position, whether I agree with it or not.
I support their right to be a pain in the ass as they try to get their voices heard.
I support their right to say unpopular things, to challenge that status quo, to push for different behavior.
In a democracy, this is (to some extent) part of the marketplace of ideas and perspectives and it’s how we do democracy.
I believe in the right to protest.
I believe in the right to work to fix the things you cannot accept.
I believe in trying to change the world for the better if you can.
I believe in advocating for those whom you see as down-trodden, or oppressed, or treated as less-than.
That, for me, is at the core of what it means to be a good human.
But this shouldn’t be happening on the backs of other people.
You are not gaining “freedom” if you gain it at the expense of another.
You are not increasing the ‘good’ in the world by creating ‘bad’ for others.
You cannot advocate for love, compassion, coexistence, and tolerance with hatred and violence as your tools.
You cannot increase good by adding bad.
There is no freedom that is built on the back of racism, antisemitism, Islamophobia, anti-Arabism, or hatred.
For either side.
It’s incumbent on folks on either side who are advocating for a better future to ensure that their movements aren’t co-opted by those seeking a platform for hatred and dehumanization.
It’s not easy, sure, but it is actually smart and possible, as a decent Palestinian or a decent Israeli, to want safety, freedom, and self-determination for your ‘enemy.’
All it takes is understanding that your ‘enemy’s’ security, liberty, and sovereignty are, ironically, the foundation of yours.
And as crazy as this sounds, once you understand that, you are forced to understand that things like antisemitism or anti-Arabism focused on your ‘enemy’ are actually counterproductive to your goals for your own success.
It becomes clear that antisemitism or anti-Arabism might well hinder your enemy, but it does so at the cost of fatally undermining your argument and casts you out of the conversation.
You will NEVER be safe from a neighbor that hates you and is afraid of you.
So how do you protest when politicians and the media are all too happy to cherry pick anecdotes to hyper-sensationalize and fan the flames of discord?
These kids, the vast majority of whom are well-meaning and fighting for a cause they believe in, are walking into the propeller blades of this dynamic and the results ain’t pretty.
But that’s the risk they have taken and, to my mind at least, the only way to mitigate that risk is with clarity, focus, and self-policing.
To me, the college protesters need to be doing a better job making clear that their vision is NOT aligned with shitty hateful narratives…
And while I most of them ARE trying to do that, they aren’t necessarily in control of what the whole group is saying…
There should be better efforts IMHO to self-police and to disavow anything that has even a whiff of antisemitism or hatred.
If your protests make others uncomfortable, fine… but they shouldn’t ever make others scared.
The protesters need to sharpen and focus to better articulate their core values — not just what they’re fighting against but fighting for.
Holding space for everyone’s trauma and crafting a narrative that doesn’t just ‘rally against’ but also ‘builds towards.’
There must be clarity that not only voices dissent but also outlines a vision for peace and coexistence.
Unequivocally upholding the integrity of their cause and keeping the atmosphere open for genuine solutions.
And yes, it’s difficult to thread that needle.
This isn’t easy.
All that said, I do think that a lot of the conversation about these protests has been manipulated.
Folks outside of the protests presenting more extreme perspectives are being conflated with the kids on campus.
And the media and other actors are more than happy to jump in and drive divisiveness.
And I think lots of folks in the core center of these protests are being tarred with the actions and beliefs of outside extremes.
There is (shocker) a lack of nuance and understanding.
I think that arrests and any other consequences specifically for those who engage in violence, antisemitism, or hate speech are not just warranted but needed.
And those students on campus advocating for their beliefs should be the first to call this out and push for it.
There is no planet where this kind of behavior is helpful to anyone or any cause.
This shames and undermines advocacy for a cause.
On the other hand, dismissing a movement in its entirety based on its most extreme proponents does a disservice both to the individuals involved and to the greater mission of fostering understanding and finding equitable solutions.
Blanket judgments play into the hands of extremists who seek to shut down dialogue and eliminate nuance.
Simplifying complex issues into zero-sum perspectives, inadvertently bolsters the very forces that thrive on division and conflict.
Moreover, I think it’s dangerous for authorities to ‘overreact’ to edge instances by going after the greater and more moderate whole.
This also increases extremism.
It sends a message to moderates that NO dissent is acceptable and feeds authoritarian diktats and narratives into what should be a democratic dialogue of push and pull.
Burning the house down isn’t how you fix your ant problem.
To my mind, the starting place is always empathy and an attempt to understand.
People on both sides of this debate have faced historical traumas and present fears that shape their realities in ways that are painful, potent, and deeply personal.
The task at hand isn’t to trivialize these experiences but to understand them so profoundly that our discussions, protests, and solutions are informed by compassion as much as conviction.
When we as “olds” see and hear the young, disaffected voices on campus, it’s crucial to remember that their black-and-white view of the world is nonetheless a critical input into the complexities recognized by those who have navigated these waters longer.
We should be listening and learning as we weigh issues.
We should honor the impulse and intent.
They point to things that WE are missing.
We can point to things that THEY are missing.
Activism is vital and the voices of the disaffected are necessary, but they mustn’t be used to silence or diminish others.
Activism that turns to hatred is no longer activism; it’s merely another form of oppression.
The challenge, then, for all of us — protestors, bystanders, and commentators alike — is to approach this issue with a mindset that seeks to amplify understanding, bridge divides, and cultivate a ground where peace cannot just be imagined but systematically built.
This means listening more than we speak, learning more than we preach, and caring more about the solutions than the sound bites.
I’ll be honest.
This is all deeply depressing.
It’s depressing to see my Jewish friends attacked and fearful.
It’s depressing to see my Palestinian siblings dying as the world shrugs.
It’s depressing to see my government take sides when they should be centering a spirit of humanism that champions dignity for all, recognizes the grievances of all sides, and works tirelessly to forge a future where coexistence isn’t just a dream but a practical reality.
It’s depressing to feel like the world we will leave behind will still be marked by the conflicts we inherited instead of a harmony that we envisioned together and worked to manifest.
It’s depressing to see how we, on a tiny speck in the cosmos, have set such a shabby and threadbare precedent as we reject empathy, nuance, justice, and peace, in favor of hatred and age-old prejudices.
With much love to you all, and with the deepest thanks to
and
for their kind guidance and feedback.
